Getting a diagnosis of Autism can be many things:

• it can be a devastating shock
• it can be a relief because you finally know what is going on, and can ask for help
• it can be confusing and frightening.

In the time to come, you will become an expert in caring for special needs children, in handling challenging behaviour and in negotiating local government bureaucracy.

To help you as you begin to learn these essential skills, and to assist you as you get access for the essential support your child needs, I recommend that you do two things.

1. Get a reliable regular babysitter. The first casualty of Autism is the parents’ lifestyle. Caring for a child with ASD can be relentless and unforgiving, and there is every possibility that your social life will suffer and even your own relationship can start to suffer. Finding a babysitter who is willing and able to care for a child who presents challenging behaviour can be very difficult (you need someone with the understanding of a genius and the patience of a saint) but any couple needs quality time to keep their relationship going: ASD parents need is so much greater.
2. Start writing a diary. This doesn’t need to be your memoirs for publication (although I wouldn’t begrudge you the fame and fortune) but it is going to be invaluable as you negotiate the minefield of local authority bureaucracy and petty mismanagement. Buy a large sturdy notebook and keep it on top of a large solid cardboard box. Every time you get a letter, when you have dealt with it put it in the box and note the date and contents in the book. Write a summary of every phone call, including date, time, who you spoke to and their ‘phone number. Every time you go to a meeting, take notes during the meeting, write a line or two in the book, and but the notes in your box. You just would not believe how many times parents have needed to refer to this information when making a complaint or taking legal action against a school or an education or health authority.